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Give and Take: WHY HELPING OTHERS DRIVES OUR SUCCESS

 


In this book, I want to persuade you that we underestimate the success of givers like David Hornik.

Although we often stereotype givers as chumps and doormats, they turn out to be surprisingly

successful. To figure out why givers dominate the top of the success ladder, we’ll examine startling

studies and stories that illuminate how giving can be more powerful—and less dangerous—than most

people believe. Along the way, I’ll introduce you to successful givers from many different walks of

life, including consultants, lawyers, doctors, engineers, salespeople, writers, entrepreneurs,

accountants, teachers, financial advisers, and sports executives. These givers reverse the popular

plan of succeeding first and giving back later, raising the possibility that those who give first are often

best positioned for success later.



But we can’t forget about those engineers and salespeople at the bottom of the ladder. Some

givers do become pushovers and doormats, and I want to explore what separates the champs from the

chumps. The answer is less about raw talent or aptitude, and more about the strategies givers use and

the choices they make. To explain how givers avoid the bottom of the success ladder, I’m going to

debunk two common myths about givers by showing you that they’re not necessarily nice, and they’re

not necessarily altruistic. We all have goals for our own individual achievements, and it turns out that

successful givers are every bit as ambitious as takers and matchers. They simply have a different way

of pursuing their goals.

This brings us to my third aim, which is to reveal what’s unique about the success of givers. Let

me be clear that givers, takers, and matchers all can—and do—achieve success. But there’s

something distinctive that happens when givers succeed: it spreads and cascades. When takers win,

there’s usually someone else who loses. Research shows that people tend to envy successful takers

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